The Worst Album Covers Ever!: 'Joyce' by Joyce Drake

Artist ~ Joyce Drake

Title ~   Joyce
                 Something about Joyce touches people, but
                 I'm not quite sure what it is. She seems to be
                 saying, "Don't be afraid! Let's get together
                 for coffee before my next hair appointment."


Well, if you ask me, I am afraid! Very afraid! There's something about our sweet, rose-adorned Miss Joyce that I do not trust... And it all begins somewhere around those dead eyes of hers! You know what they say about windows to the soul, and all. Only, I'm not convinced that one exists inside. And the hair! God knows what lies beneath that curly helmet...


~ Image and info taken from the book, 'The Worst Album Covers Ever!', by Nick DiFonzo. Published by Barnes & Noble, Inc. ~

The Worst Album Covers Ever!: 'Love that Showbiz!' by The Castle Family

Artist ~ The Castle Family
Title ~ Love that Showbiz!

In the wake of the Osmonds, family variety acts sprung
up all over the United States. This happy-looking bunch
hailed from Minneapolis, Minnesota. And by the looks
of it, I'd say that "showbiz" wasn't the only thing this
brass-y Castle clan shared a love for... Did ya get a load
of those matching, kinky perms?!




I don't know about you, but I did a double take when I first saw this cover. I couldn't quite distinguish between male and female family members, mainly due to their dizzying cluster of matching poodle perms and shiny red satin. But when in doubt, look for boobs (or breasts, rather, because these folks are all "boobs" in my opinion)! Then, of course, it's completely obvious. The Castle men are wearing the matching red satin pants and jackets, while the Castle ladies are in cream-colored tops and red satin pants only, sans jackets. However, I'm not entirely convinced about all three of those Castle "men"...



~Image and info taken from the book, 'The Worst Album Covers Ever!' by Nick Di Fonzo. Published by Barnes & Noble, Inc.~

Goldfrapp - Odd name, great music!

I discovered Goldfrapp years ago, just after they had released their first album, 'Felt Mountain'. I can even remember when I bought the CD because I was immediately drawn to it on the store shelf by its unique cover image. Well, that and the odd name. Both factors combined to ensure my sampling of it at a nearby listening station, and once I'd heard the music along with Alison's beautiful voice, I was hooked!

The band is Alison Goldfrapp (that's where the funny name comes from) and Will Gregory. Their sound is hard to pin down because it has varied over the last 4 albums, but I guess you could say that it's basically electronic pop at the core. 'Felt Mountain', which came out back in 2000, had a very cinematic sound with elements of cabaret, folk, ambient and electronica. Alison's voice range is so insane that, on this album in particular, it's operatic at times!

Here's a music video from 'Felt Mountain' for the song, 'Utopia'...







Gorgeously shot video, wouldn't you say? Even though it is a little creepy toward the end, with all of that blue goop being sucked up through Alison's nose and into her brain. And that's assuming that who we're seeing is the real Alison because it also appears as though some sort of cloning has occurred. That was my interpretation of it, anyway. Maybe, you saw a different story?

Their second album, 'Black Cherry', went waaay off in a different direction! Released in 2003, it was a dance/glam rock inspired powerhouse and I LOVED IT! Not only was the music really hot and sexy, Alison completely transformed her image from a sophisticated Marlene Dietrich look into that of a New Wave diva. And it works on her, let me tell you!

Take a look for yourself. This is the music video for 'Strict Machine', the second single off of 'Black Cherry' which reached #1 on the dance charts...







Now, was that HOT, or what?! Alison has got it goin' ON! Cool hair, too, huh?! I've always liked her awesome blonde, curly locks. If I were a lady, that's the hair I'd want. Fo' sho!

With the third album, 'Supernature', Alison & Will decided to stick with the electro dance vibe. And because of that, I was a very happy, bouncing 35-year-old boy! Although released in 2005, 'Supernature' received 2 Grammy nominations in 2007. One for "Best Electronic/Dance Album" and another for "Best Dance Recording" which was specifically for the first single, 'Ooh La La'. That was all really cool, but I don't get how the timing worked out for those? Album released in 2005... Grammy nominations 2 years later in 2007... Huh? Whatever.

The song, 'Number 1', was the second single off of 'Supernature', and also my favorite track on that album. Here's the music video for your viewing and listening pleasure...

Great song, beautiful lady, cute dogs and a fun sense of humor... What more could you want?! I guess that the dogs with the human bodies are a bit disturbing, but I think that's sorta the point.

In 2008, Goldfrapp released their fourth album, 'Seventh Tree'. And with it, they shifted gears once again to replace their electronic dance groove with more ambient and down tempo music. One of the main things they did was incorporate acoustic guitars in order to create a "warmer" sound.

The first single off of 'Seventh Tree', and a fine example of the warmer, down tempo sound was, 'A & E'. Go ahead, take a look & a listen...







I like how Alison seems to be communing with nature. The dancing leaves and dancing tree people are wonderful. Did you happen to see the fox run by? He was very quick! There was also a beautiful brief shot of an owl. Did you see him?

This excellent duo just finished recording their fifth album, 'Head First', and it's scheduled for release in late March, 2010. An excerpt from the band's official website describes the new album as, "Goldfrapp's most powerful trip to date, a speedy rush of synth optimism, euphoria, fantasy and romance." Also, the first single will be, 'Rocket'. I cannot wait! I just know that I'm gonna love it! Alison could probably sing the phone book and I'd be perfectly happy...

So that's my nutshell bio on Goldfrapp. There's actually a lot more interesting stuff about them, and more videos, too. I guess you could say this was just an appetizer! If you'd like to know more about them, go check out their website. Plus, Alison has been doing a little blog of her own, although posting entries somewhat sporadically.

Now, I wonder where that 'Rocket' is going? Not that it makes any difference, because I'll be on it no matter where it's headed!

~Photo via Google Images~

Freak Show Friday: Pete Burns

All photos via Google Image Search

Yes, Pete Burns is still technically a man, but I wouldn't blame you for thinking otherwise. In fact, if you knew him back in the 1980s as the lead singer for Dead Or Alive, you might not even recognize him now. He always WAS flamboyant and a bit of a diva, but after he became addicted to plastic surgery, the freak-factor really started to climb! Just LOOK at those lips!

The last several Dead Or Alive albums have seen band members come and go, but Pete has been the one common thread holding the act together. However, in my opinion, nothing they've done since the album 'Mad, Bad, and Dangerous to Know' has been any good. And that's probably because they did not retain the same fun, edgy, slightly goth dance vibe that drew them so much attention and success in the '80s. I know that it's usually better for bands to change or evolve, instead of just continuing to crank out the same sort of material and stagnating... But that applies to the artists who take it seriously, and I think we all know that Dead Or Alive was always pretty much disposable. Plus, it would seem that the ONLY thing Pete has ever taken seriously is his appearance!

See, he's not a woman...

Those are man breasts, baby!

I have to say that 'Youthquake' will always be my favorite Dead Or Alive album, and I certainly think that Pete's dark, and almost spooky look during that time was the best. Here, take a look at the album cover, below.

Their look and sound just seemed so

different than anything else at the time.

And Pete had great hair!

In a dramatic, blue mood...

There's that wild & sexy hair, again!

It's like a lion's mane, and I soooo

wished that MY hair would do that!

Now, I get to be the spooky one and show you something REALLY scary. As perhaps a modern-day cautionary tale, Pete details his truly horrific experience with cosmetic lip surgery gone WAY wrong in his autobiography, 'Freak Unique'. Take a look, below, for just a sampling of what he went through.

WARNING: The following images most assuredly will disturb you and/or make you sick to your stomach. View at your own discretion!

You KNOW that's gotta hurt!
It almost looks like how people used
to stitch a dead person's mouth
closed for burial...

It got so bad that his lips were actually

oozing pus! Now, tell me, is ANYTHING

worth going through this?!

Now, you'd never know that those

plump, voluptuous "mouth pillows"

weren't natural... Yeah, RIGHT!

Here's the book.

Not only does Pete talk about all

of the plastic surgery, he also shares

an intimate behind-the-scenes look

at his life as a pop star.

Tommy was a big Dead Or Alive fan

too, so we're planning to read it

out loud to each other, and giggle a lot!

Well, that about covers it. For a general overview of a man who would become a lady-like man, anyway. Have a great weekend, everybody! And try NOT to think of those scary lip photos the next time you go to kiss your honey...