Vintage Drugstore Carnival: 'Lifebuoy Health Soap'... The soap of considerate people.

"Peggy, did you catch a whiff of Fran?"

"Oh, my. I thought I smelled something, Helen. But, you know, I'm not the least bit surprised. The other day, we were at the supermarket together and I couldn't help noticing that she had some cheap, off-brand bath soap in her shopping cart..."

"Tsk, tsk. What some women won't do to save a few pennies!"


~ Image taken from the postcard book, "Just what the doctor ordered": Health and Grooming in the Classic Age of Advertising. Published by Prion Books Limited, London. ~

Vintage Drugstore Carnival: 'Bile Beans'... To be attractively slim, and to ensure regular daily elimination!

While Bile Beans were initially pitched as a cure for biliousness, the influenza epidemic of 1899 was too good an opportunity to miss. Horrible though the flu was, a lot of people would recover after a week or so anyway, and it was an easy matter for quacks to point to cases where the recovery coincided with the taking of their medicine.

A leaflet enclosed with the Beans stated that they were also a cure for cirrhosis of the liver, blackheads, and all "female complaints" (Sorry about that, ladies), and later they were mainly targeted at women, using glamorous pictures that now appear incongruous with the unattractive product name. Although the leaflet said that the Beans did not include mercury, bismuth, or aloes, they did contain aloin - an aloe extract with laxative properties that is no longer considered safe because of its potential side effects. The other ingredients were cardamom, peppermint oil and wheat flour, with a black gelatin coating. Yummmy!
 
The story behind the Beans went that an Australian scientist, Charles Forde, had discovered an ancient aboriginal remedy. The actual inventor was a Canadian called Charles E. Fulford, and the story about the aborigines was completely made up. Although this was revealed during a 1905 court case where Fulford sued the proprietor of an imitation product, the Bile Beans became very popular in the 20th century and were still on sale in the 1980s.
 
 
~ Image taken from the postcard book, "Just what the doctor ordered": Health and Grooming in the Classic Age of Advertising. All info taken from thequackdoctor.com. ~ 
 
 

Vintage Drugstore Carnival: 'Scott Tissue'... When peculiar, private itching breaks concentration.

"When I asked Mary what was the matter she complained of an itching. I asked a friend's advice at Mother's Club that afternoon. She said it was probably caused by harsh or impure toilet tissue, and recommended Scott Tissue." Those were the days when advertising still used some level of discretion. Boy, nowadays we see animated bears dancing around on the T.V. with toilet paper confetti stuck on their rumps! I suppose the people who are marketing that particular product think they're being subtle, but come on... Those damned poo bears are pretty blatant! And I guess I just find it somehow more disturbing since it's trying to be all cutesy-cartoony about bears pooping and the toilet paper sticking to their dirty butts. It's just gross, you know? Not that I'm a prude, because that certainly isn't the case.

Another part of the ad text that I find interesting is where it goes on to share how experiences like Mary's "are common. Harsh tissue can cause serious inflammation. Women and girls especially, because of their peculiar requirements, need a soft, highly absorbent tissue - such as Scott Tissue or Waldorf."

Evidently, those "tissue issues" can mean some serious "sh*t" for the ladies. Or so they'd like us to think...

~ Image taken from the postcard book, "Just what the doctor ordered": Health and Grooming in the Classic Age of Advertising. Published by Prion Books Limited, London. ~

Vintage Drugstore Carnival: 'Listerine'... Because halitosis makes you unpopular.

"Don't fool yourself! Since halitosis never announces itself to the victim, you simply cannot know when you have it." Ya gotta love that sales tactic! Nothing seems more effective than fear or paranoia to really push a product. And if that doesn't work, surely knocking down people's self-esteem by telling them they'll be "unpopular" should do the trick! If you click to enlarge the advertisement, pay particular attention to the FACTS in the lower right-hand corner. I love that they're relying on what 68 hairdressers had to say about their clientele, "many of them from wealthy classes". And, after all, "Who should know better than they?"


~ Image taken from the postcard book, "Just what the doctor ordered": Health and Grooming in the Classic Age of Advertising. Published by Prion Books Limited, London. ~

Vintage Drugstore Carnival: 'Grove's Tasteless Chill Tonic'... Does a body good!

In this chill tonic, which came out in 1878, Edwin Wiley Grove found a way to bottle a quinine (only known malaria medication of the time) mixture that would eliminate the bitter taste. This tasteless tonic, which some claimed wasn't all that tasteless, was quite an improvement over taking straight quinine for fever and chills caused by malaria. A sweet syrup and lemon flavor was added to the quinine, along with cinchonine and cinchonidine, which were the main ingredients in crystal form within the tonic. The chill tonic was so popular that the British army made it standard issue for every soldier going off to mosquito infested lands and, by 1890, more bottles of Grove's Tasteless Chill Tonic were sold than bottles of Coca-Cola.

So much success... All achieved with a marketing campaign like that one??!
Boy, have times changed.


~ Image taken from the postcard book, "Just What the Doctor Odrered": Health and Grooming in the Classic Age of Advertising. Published by Prion Books Limited, London. ~

Trick 'r Treat!

"Boo", everyone!
Please, enjoy this gallery of happy Halloween hijinx...
if you dare!






I can hardly stand seeing this pic. Guess
I just don't have the stomach for it...

  































What you can't see here is the small print
which reads, "Butcher knife sold separately."

  
































Alright. As far as I'm concerned, these pumpkins
are sooo hideous that they're actually "cutting edge!"



























Holy crap! If these kids were walking down
MY street, I'd find me a baseball bat QUICK!



































Nothing funny, here. I just like the soft
candlelight from the jack-o-lantern. Plus,
I think she's a pretty lady.



...And then eat ALL of their candy
once they've gone to bed!



Happy Halloween! And remember, don't open your front door if the Trick 'r Treaters are so tall you can see their eyes through the peep hole!

~ All images taken from Jim Heimann's book, 'Halloween: Vintage Holiday Graphics'. Published by Taschen. ~

The Worst Album Covers Ever!: 'Marcy Sings to Children' by Marcy Tigner

Artist ~  Marcy Tigner
Title   ~   Marcy Sings to Children

                    Marcy Tigner was an aspiring gospel singer whose
                    career was stymied by her high, childlike voice. She
                    finally found fame after learning ventriloquism and
                    inventing her "Little Marcy" character. She released
                    dozens of records in the 1960s and '70s and was
                    wildly successful.


As far as I'm concerned, this is a perfect album to share this time of year! It's just so darn creepy, don't you think? There's something about that little doll singing on that little stage of hers... I know, I know, it's all supposed to be nice, innocent fun. But did you happen to notice the second song title on the first side of the record? It's 'When Mr. Satan Knocks At My Heart's Door', for corn sake! Now, if that doesn't at least seem creepy to you...


~  Image and info taken from the book, 'The Worst Album Covers Ever' by Nick DiFonzo. Published by Barnes & Noble, Inc. ~